NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
