Only a mothe r could love this liver
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
