just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
