i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
