id be glad to
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
