So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
