I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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