May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize