My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
