I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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