So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
