Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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