I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
