Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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