Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
