Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
We got so high we made milksteak
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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