i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just had sex on a roof
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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