I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
