JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize