I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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