Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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