Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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