Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize