Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
