you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Success! We fucked roommates!
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
