I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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