Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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