He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize