If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
