Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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