I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
