He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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