Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
