Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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