thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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