Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry Horse6608 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(806): View more from Texas

Jesus knows you're telling a lie.

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup

Fav 6 5138 1041
share tweet
(319): View more from Iowa

You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many

Fav 8 5242 1434
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(407): View more from Florida

Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.

Fav 9 5002 1127
share tweet
(920): View more from Wisconsin

Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...

Fav 4 3431 2443
share tweet
(702): View more from Nevada

I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.

Fav 4 3300 1740
share tweet
(714): View more from California

sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.

Fav 9 3613 1438
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(218): View more from Minnesota

His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.

(612): View more from Minnesota

His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.

Fav 8 1113 1529
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(317): View more from Indiana

Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"

Fav 0 35 29
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(530): View more from California

Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?

Fav 0 32 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT