I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
