Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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