this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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