Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I fill condoms, not promises.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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