I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Come share oat with me in your robe
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
