we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
