she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
bring money and cleavage
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Randomize
