It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Even my vagina gasped.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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