So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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