There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize