I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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