pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
