After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
