It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
